You know you got me really intrigued. Internet dating was not made for the man but for the woman. I've gone through the evolution of online dating trying to figure it out and that's the one thing I've learned. Internet Dating is made for the woman, not the man. At first when I started to come online a few years back, I acted like we were on an even playing field but I moved forward hesitantly, for fear I would get rejected. Oh the fear of rejection, how crippling it can be! But wait, it was online, surely from what I've learned from the theory of online self disclosure, this was false! The person on the other end would truly be more apt at really getting to know someone. It surely could not be as superficial as it is in a drunken fraternity house! Definitely not! So I slowly crept out from my underneath my shell and started engaging the women online. I would spend the time to read every detail of every word they posted. I would take a step back and based off of what I read, I would mold my response to something witty that would both let her know I had read her profile but took the time to tailor my response just for her. Figuring the extra time and effort would pay dividends. I even wrote my profile to be humorous, intelligent, active and family oriented. I did all that. One day after all my effort and frustration of not getting responses, I noticed I had written 72 of these type of introductory correspondences.... and had received three responses back, all from one girl who like you kept changing her mind and was letting a single chink in my armour derail any chance we may have had.
And so I continued on this roller coaster that is online dating. Up and down I went trying to figure it all out. Up and down my interests went for it realizing that at some point over the past few years this roller coaster had become too common and was no longer exciting but was the only thing I knew. And so I continued. Up and down. With little to no luck, I sought the advice of my friend. She told me which pictures to use, cautioned me to stay mysterious for it would keep the woman intrigued and wanting a little bit more resulting in a date, and she read my lengthy description I had written about myself and she agreed was funny, intelligent, active and family oriented, everything I wanted to convey and told me to delete it all except for one sentence that is still there... bewildered I was but listened I did. Not 24 hours later, I received an unsolicited message in my inbox. How excited I was. Perhaps she had cracked the code! And so I continued and soon after that flame that had burnt so brightly attracting women from so far away like a lighthouse calling to the weary sailor fizzled away. And so I stood there wondering what had changed?
I contemplated all of this one day traveling on a boat from the Isle of Santorini to Mykonos then to Athens. And on this boat ride I found the inspiration for my second sentence in my description. And so I wrote it, not thinking too much of it, but with that sentence, it spoke to women and so this lighthouse light that had fizzled away had gained new life. Had i cracked the code? I added photos of the places I had been and dinner dates it became... a few dates came and went.. and to my frustration with one girl she only ate on weekdays. And so up and down I went until that lighthouse faded away once again. It was during this time where I finally discovered that online dating was in favor of the woman and not the man. For all the effort I had placed hadn't really changed my circumstances as they are now. So I took a different approach...
I relegated to the wise words I had come to revere back in my past. Knock on 31 doors, and one will surely open, one sale would be made. The wise words of a college curriculum which included cold calling from door to door. And so I clicked clicked clicked clicked clicked clicked clicked clicked yes. I swiped swiped swiped swiped swiped right right right right right and yes. I sat back and with little thought; I knocked on 31 doors. This is when you came across my screen for the third time. The other times I had tried and your lighthouse light had failed. So what the heck, "Hi! How have you been? We going to grab dinner this time" expecting another downward turn on this roller coaster ride.... but intrigued she was for she said yes. Still trying to stay mysterious when the coffee would not schedule, I did not say much.... and to no avail we did not "make a good match." What's that secret phrase?... I wonder... what's that secret approach? So I asked and suddenly coffee was back on the table? Bewildered am I.
when you mentioned coffee... i thought to myself, this girl probably would not let me treat her like a lady. She probably would not let me buy her dinner... as beautiful as she is, she probably wouldn't let me take her on a proper date... What is it with California women killing chivalry from the beginning, not allowing themselves to be treated like a lady... she's probably right, we're probably not compatible... so what the heck, i'll just get this off my chest and maybe say it in a funny, humorous way. I don't know if you got any enjoyment out of that, but *shrugs* its not like we'll ever meet.
Either way, I really do hope you find what you are looking for... but take it from me, let yourself be treated to dinner cause men still want to be men, even if online dating is made for women.